# Who vs whom

Canonical: https://duckyhelper.com/learn/grammar/who-vs-whom/
Updated: 2026-10-01

Use who for the person doing the action, like he or she: Who called? Use whom for the person receiving the action or after a preposition, like him or her: To whom did you write? Test it by answering the question in your head. If the answer is him or her, use whom. If it is he or she, use who. Casual speech often uses who everywhere, but formal writing keeps whom.

## The he or him test

| Sentence | Answer it | Right word | Why |
| --- | --- | --- | --- |
| *___ left the lights on?* | *He* left them on. | Who | *He* is a subject pronoun, so *who*. |
| *To ___ should I send this?* | Send it to *him*. | whom | *Him* is an object pronoun, and it follows *to*. |
| *___ did you invite?* | I invited *her*. | Whom | *Her* is an object, so *whom*. |
| *The girl ___ won the race is my cousin.* | *She* won the race. | who | Inside its own clause, the word is the subject of *won*. |
| *The coach, ___ everyone respected, retired.* | Everyone respected *him*. | whom | Inside its clause, the word is the object of *respected*. |

> **Tip: Memory trick**
>
> *Whom* and *him* both end in *m*. If *him* fits, use *whom*.

## Whoever and whomever

The same test works, but only inside the small clause where the word sits. In *Give the prize to ___ finishes first*, the clause is *___ finishes first*. Answer it: *he* finishes first. So write *whoever*, even though *to* comes before it, because the word is the subject of *finishes*.

## Worked examples

**Example 1: a question**

Problem: *(Who / Whom) are you going to the movies with?*

1. Turn it into a statement and answer it: *I am going with him.*
2. *Him* means the object form.
3. In formal writing, move the preposition to the front: *With whom are you going to the movies?*

Answer: *Whom are you going to the movies with?* (casual speech often says *who*)

**Example 2: a clause in the middle**

Problem: *The author (who / whom) I met at the library signed my book.*

1. Find the small clause: *___ I met at the library*.
2. Rearrange it: *I met ___ at the library.* I met *her*.
3. *Her* is an object, so *whom*.

Answer: *The author whom I met at the library signed my book.*

## Common mistakes and fixes

| Mistake | Fix |
| --- | --- |
| Using *whom* to sound formal when the word is a subject | *Whom is calling?* is wrong. Test: *he is calling*, so *who*. |
| Letting a word like *to* decide | Look at the word's job inside its own clause, as in *to whoever finishes first*. |
| Being tricked by *I think* in the middle | *The student who I think won* is right: ignore *I think*, and *he won*. |
| Mixing up *who's* and *whose* | *Who's* means *who is*. *Whose* shows ownership: *Whose bag is this?* |

## Practice

**Five who or whom questions**

1. *___ left the lights on in the gym?*
   A. Who
   B. Whom
   C. Whose
   D. Who's

   Answer: Who. Answer it: *he* left them on. *He* is a subject, so *who*. *Whose* shows ownership and *who's* means *who is*.

2. In formal writing: *To ___ should I address the letter?*
   A. who
   B. whom
   C. whose
   D. who's

   Answer: whom. Address it to *him*. *Him* is an object, and it comes right after the preposition *to*, so *whom*.

3. *The student ___ won the award gave a short speech.*
   A. who
   B. whom
   C. whose
   D. which

   Answer: who. Inside the clause, *___ won the award*, the word is the subject: *she* won. So *who*. *Which* is not used for people in this kind of clause.

4. In formal writing: *The coach, ___ everyone respected, retired last year.*
   A. who
   B. whom
   C. whose
   D. who's

   Answer: whom. Inside the clause, *everyone respected ___*: everyone respected *him*. That is an object, so *whom*.

5. *Give the prize to ___ finishes first.*
   A. whoever
   B. whomever
   C. whom
   D. who's

   Answer: whoever. The word is the subject of *finishes* inside its own clause: *he* finishes first. So *whoever*, even though *to* comes before the clause. *Whomever* and *whom* are object forms, and *who's* means *who is*.

## Frequently asked questions

### Is whom dying out?

In everyday speech, many people use *who* in every case, and Purdue OWL notes that *whom* is not used very often in American English. But it is still expected in formal writing, especially right after a preposition: *to whom*, *for whom*, *with whom*.

### What about whose?

*Whose* shows ownership: *Whose jacket is this?* It is a different word from *who's*, which is short for *who is* or *who has*: *Who's coming?* Test it by saying *who is*.

### Does the SAT test who and whom?

College Board's list of Form, Structure, and Sense skills names agreement, verb forms, modifiers, plurals and possessives, but not *who* versus *whom* by name. It matters most in formal essays and English classes. Learn the *he* or *him* test and you will rarely miss it.

## Sources

- [Purdue OWL, Pronoun Case](https://owl.purdue.edu/owl/general_writing/grammar/pronouns/pronoun_case.html), accessed 2026-10-01
- [Purdue OWL, Introduction to Defining Clauses](https://owl.purdue.edu/owl/general_writing/grammar/relative_pronouns/index.html), accessed 2026-10-01

## Related

- [Pronoun-antecedent agreement](https://duckyhelper.com/learn/grammar/pronoun-antecedent-agreement/)
- [Its vs it's](https://duckyhelper.com/learn/grammar/its-vs-its/)
- [Subject-verb agreement](https://duckyhelper.com/learn/grammar/subject-verb-agreement/)
- [Grammar study guides](https://duckyhelper.com/learn/grammar/)

## Try asking Ducky

- "Check every who and whom in my essay with the he or him test."
- "Why is it whoever and not whomever in this sentence?"
- "Quiz me on who, whom, whose and who's."

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